Valuable Memories to Start

Oasis, good stuff. Why did I choose that song? Not because of any person in particular, but memories... I'll get to that in a second. I pulled an all nighter the night before last, and it was the first in a long time. I worked on my MIS project, and my teammates were impressed. I'm not particularly impressed with them at the moment though. They seem more worried about the color scheme than the actual work, which bugs me. I think they got the message yesterday when I showed them all of the work that I put into the project. I think they finally opened their eyes and thought to themselves, 'whoa, i need to get shit done'. I hope that's what they felt anyway. I've been crazy busy, and thank God for that. Other than school work, I don't have anything happening in my life right now. That's sad, but it's just the truth. I'm not really putting myself out there to be honest, and a lot of it is time that I just don't have. I haven't seen the inside of my apartment during conciousness in I don't know how long. I'm kinda lonely, and for someone that makes friends pretty easily that's a hard thing to swallow. Oh well, my MIS and CS projects will keep me company. So, back to the memories. I got to reflecting back on the times in my life that I look back on, and I just don't want them to go away. Things that will stick with me and echo through eternity. There aren't many of those kinds of moments. I don't even mean the kind that you are just having fun, either. I mean the memories that actually had real value and are meaningful to you, be them fun or not. I haven't really tried to put them down in a list or anything, but here are a few that I thought would be nice to write down... 1. Magda told me she loved me: She is to this day the only woman to ever say it and mean it in a romantic way. She wound up not sticking to the commitment, but at the time she really meant it. It is the only time in my life that I really experienced a mutual love. I've had other girls in my life, but nothing where I thought it would actually go anywhere. 2. My time in Switzerland: It was the great adventure of my life. I found out that there is nothing like going to a place where you are totally lost and helpless. I'm a linguist, but I don't speak German. Lots of people there speak English, but you still learn more about yourself when you're helpless than at any other time. It cuts you from groin to sternum, and shows you what you're made of, and I liked myself. That was a turning point in my life. My grandfather had passed away earlier that year, and I was near suicidal for months as he was a father figure in my life. I took that trip in need of finding something special, and I found it. I found myself. Everything changed after that experience, and I haven't looked back since. 3. My first A back: I went through a program at uni to get myself in order, and to be eligible for a good grad school. I went through a lot of crap classes at a community college, but the first of which was a Math class that I needed to get out of the way. I was never particularly interested or gifted at mathematics. I was always a much better communicator and writer than anything else. I took that class, and one which had prior terror in my life. It was my Everest. I got my test back, and I made a 98. I swear to you that I have never been more proud of myself than at that moment. I was almost in tears. I became a better student because of it, and I found that I was good at math after all. I had just never put in enough effort towards it. In fact, I found out later that I was one of the best in my school at it. It was a moment that showed me who I am, not who I used to be. 4. Ryo's departure: I stayed up all night the night before Ryo left to go back to Japan. I made a photo album of all of the memories we held as roommates and fellow students at the university. I handed it to him in the morning, and he left as quickly as he could so that it would be easier on the both of us. I think it was just as hard for him as it was for me. When he left the apartment was empty, and I felt like a hole was thrown right into the very center of my being. It was the second worst goodbye I've ever had to endure. 5. Zack's arrival: Nothing quite comforts you more than the return of an old friend. I had talked to Zack for a long time about coming down to UA, and he had done so the year before. I was overwhelmed and blessed to have my lifelong friend to take Ryo's place. There is nothing like staying up until God knows what hour just talking about life, playing football on the computer all night, and keeping company of a great friend who holds your values. Oh, and a couple of pbj and doritos sandwiches sloshed down with some toilet bowl. Well, I didn't mean to put them in chronological order, but it turned out that way. Those are moments I hang onto sometimes. Those are the kind that fills life up with meaning. It has everything in it that matters. Love that later turns to heartbreak, a turning point and self realization cojoined with confidence, a real accomplishment that only has real value to yourself, a parting, and a reunion. I have been lucky. I've had a good life. I just hope that I have lots of more moments like these, and that they don't go away, kinda like Oasis.